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Disappointed, but Motivated

Today was the bboy event, The Big Payback Volume 4. The day started off rushed; I went to go eat lunch with a couple of friends, and then I left around 1, which was when the jam started. We knew that jams usually start late, which is why we left late. But the thing is that battles started 2:30, so I wasn’t able to properly warm up. I also forgot the memory card for my camera, so I couldn’t take pictures, which made me so frustrated. After a few battles I was finally called. For some reason I felt really nervous; I faced Maniak from 700 crew, a strong and worthy opponent. I had a game plan going in, but I thought about it and I decided to let the music take me to whatever I was doing. It worked somewhat, but I crashed, BIG time. Well, to me at least I did. People said they didn’t notice,  but I knew what I did was definitely not planned, and I’m pretty sure the judges saw it.

I really beat myself up after the battle. I didn’t even shake hands with Maniac because I was so frustrated. I then walked around and decided to sit in a corner to keep myself calm and composed. After a few minutes of that I decided to go watch a few more battles, and then went up to Mani to tell him that it was a good battle and I didn’t mean to walk away from him. After, I decided to get my mind off it by going in a few cyphers. It helped. The music really took me away, and all of a sudden I was in a better mood then when i came in. I decided to make the best of the jam and checked out all the battles and went into cyphers throughout the whole event. 

Overall I was extremely disappointed in myself, but at the same time motivated. Seeing all the bboys that I’ve known for some time get so much better, it makes me want to step up my game. After 4 years, I feel like it’s finally time for me to get serious and start getting into the scene. I mean I might as well; I feel like I’m at my prime right now.

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